Everyone talks about baby blues. It makes sense that a woman would be all kinds of emotional after having a baby. Between the hormones, the drastic lifestyle change, the lack of sleep, and the fact that now you have this little person in your life that you worry about and obsess over non-stop, it’s no wonder postpartum women don’t completely lose their minds!
My baby blues have come in waves. One minute I’m great, happy, and chipper. The next I’m balling my eyes out because my husband didn’t remember what time the baby peed (“I specifically asked you to make a note of it. How can you not care? Didn’t you listen to me?”). The biggest source of sadness for me surprised me, though.
I cannot tell you how many times I have cried about not being pregnant anymore. I remember one day in particular. I was standing in the shower and I realized I could see my toes.
I cried for 15 minutes straight.
I tried to explain why not being pregnant makes me so sad to my hubby.
“I just miss feeling her move around. And now I have to share her. And now she has to grow up.”
I know not all women have great pregnancies. A lot of women are miserable (and rightfully so) during some, if not all, of the time they’re carrying their little bundles of joy.
Not me, though. I loved being pregnant! And yes. I absolutely love being a mom. And I love having Norah here to snuggle and care for.
I just still miss the little kicks. She was my buddy; she went with me everywhere. When I was having a bad day, I would rub my belly and everything seemed to be better instantly.
I just miss that.